I like people sometimes.

I like people, but only sometimes.

Lately, I feel as though every time I sit down on a plane, some chatty middle-aged man sits down next to me and completely ignores the fact that I'm reading or, you know, not at all interested in talking. I keep thinking that part of that is my fault, because I tend to respond politely and so then I think well, I'm engaging them in conversation, so how can I complain? Then, recently I read an article about how this is a common phenomenon, that always seems to involve chatty middle-aged men - it's always men - and youngish women, particularly women without the encumbrance of a wedding ring or traveling companion.

It's not the men are even hitting on the women. They just view the book as non-existent, and the woman's presence as expendable. This particular writer was pretty angry about it, saying that the men ignoring the book and talk talk talking anyway is a sign that they disrespect the woman's time. I read that and a lightbulb went off, because that is just so true. And it is so annoying. I don't really like being put in a position to feel I have to be rude just to get someone to leave me alone or understand what he is choosing not to see, which is that I'm reading here! So this is your PSA, gentlemen: no, she does not want to talk to you. Leave her alone.

So the other afternoon, I took my aisle seat and the plane started filling up. I was reading my book when a tall, thirty-ish man gestured to the middle seat and asked if he could sit there.

Sure, of course, it's Southwest, so any open seat is up for grabs (or should be. I have seen assholes deny someone seating in an effort to keep the middle seat open, only for the flight to be full and they end up with an even bigger dude sitting in the middle. Karma is such a bitch.).

I move so the man can take his seat and I could go back to my book. Or at least, I try to go back to my book. Turns out Mr. Middle Seat is also Mr. Chatty. Luckily, the window seat lady was more than happy to talk to him, so crisis averted.

Then, we sat on the tarmac. And sat there. And sat there. Who knows why we sat there so long, but we did. And that's when I realized that Mr. Middle Seat was actually Mr. Friendly and Interesting. The three of us had a lovely conversation. We learned that Mr. Middle Seat is indeed in his early 30s. He is on his way back from a cruise with his brother (who was sitting in front of me) and his fiance's family. We talked a bit about the wedding (August), and how the fiance wants them to write their own vows, so he's going to have to figure that one out. The honeymoon is a week in Yellowstone National Park, which he seemed to think he had to justify, because I bet he has been getting shit about that from other people (why? Yellowstone is awesome), but Ms. Window Seat and I thought that was a great destination.

We had all been talking for about a half an hour (Mr. Middle Seat is former Navy, he has lived in Hawaii and Dubai. Seriously, this guy was happy to share.)  when Mr. Middle Seat mentioned that his fiancé was also on the plane. Turns out she is a nervous flyer. A really nervous flyer. She was crying and shaking before boarding.

Dude! I said. Why didn't you say something before? I would have switched seats so you could sit together. He was so surprised and seemed genuinely touched that I would have been willing to do that. I think he truly didn't want to inconvenience anyone by asking, so he just took his middle seat and was making the best of it. Which of course just made me want to help them more.

Unfortunately, at this point, the flight attendants were finally getting the plane ready for take off, so I didn't want to get up just then lest it cause a delay. Mr. Middle Seat thanked me anyway, and we all went back to chatting.

After another fifteen minutes or so, when I realized that we weren't actually taking off at all (probably ever), I asked where the fiance was. She was in an aisle seat just a few rows back from me. Please. I have so got this. I ran back, asked if she was Lauren. She was so startled but said yes. I said I'm sitting next to your fiance, would you like to switch?

This dear sweet girl, who I could tell had been crying, started to say oh, no, that's okay, when her seat mates, who had clearly been having a similar conversation with her, both said Go! Go!

So I grabbed my bag, Lauren grabbed hers, the flight attendant looked startled, and we switched.

When I sat with my new seat mates, it turns out they really had been having the same conversation. They were a married couple, and had noticed that Lauren was nervous and playing with her ring, so they asked her about it to distract her. They also had offered to switch seats ("We've been married for 14 years, so we can stand to not sit together for an hourlong flight!") and she had politely declined, not wanting to trouble anyone. They also knew all about the cruise, and the wedding plans, "and the honeymoon in Yellowstone!" we said simultaneously.

I chatted just a bit with my new seat mates until we FINALLY did take off, and then things quieted down, and I got out my book, marveling at how, the closer I got to my new home in New England, the nicer people tend to be, every time.